This may be the most unoriginal phrase ever typed: Valentine's Day sucks when you are single.
I blame Valentine's Day, and all the hype about perfect gifts and romance for getting me thinking about past relationships. Even the Google doodle is tormenting us single folk.
Tonight I found myself thinking about old girlfriends, lost opportunities, past mistakes.
One woman in particular has been on my mind lately. While I have spend much of my dating life (when not single) in monogamous relationship -- at least the were monogamous as far as I knew -- there was one woman in my life who I think of as a lover, not a girlfriend. Perhaps that is because she was actually involved with someone else when we had our adventures. I never let myself think that a relationship was possible, even when she got to the point where she made it clear that is what she wanted with me.
So, I never intentionally put my heart into the relationship, but that is not to say I was not emotionally invested. The woman -- let's call her her Tracy -- and I shared an emotional intimacy I had never shared with a woman up to that point. We could talk about most anything. We shared fears and fantasies. We talked. Really talked.
Maybe that was because the relationship started as an online relationship. We talked on chat and on the phone long before we ever met. And for some reason, I find it much easier to confess my secrets at the keyboard rather than face-to-face.
One day, a few months ago, I got an email from Tracy out of the blue in honor of milestone. While we both moved on, long ago, it was great to hear from her. It seemed like old times. She asked a few questions in her message, and I wrote back. But there was no reply.
Blackness. A flash of bright light. Then blackness again. Only the lingering afterimage of the light remained, before fading away.
Things would not of worked with Tracy for many reasons, not least of which was that I was not ready. But I miss the friend. I miss the friendship. I miss the adventure and the daring taboo nature of it all.
I've been playing life safe for a while. Not sure I would recommend it. A crisis of confidence, perhaps. In love. In work. In play.
Valentine's Day is not for the timid of heart.
Yes, I miss Tracy. But perhaps as much as anything, I miss the me I was willing to be back then.
4 comments:
THANKS TO DR BENEDICT FOR SOLVING MY PROBLEMS
An amazing testimony on a spell caster who brought my wife back to me.. My name is Andy Sowers,i live in Australia,and I'm happily married to a lovely and caring wife,with two kids.A very big problem occurred in my family seven months ago,between me and my wife.so terrible that she took the case to court for a divorce.she said that she never wanted to stay with me again,and that she didn't love me anymore.So she packed out of my house and made me and my children passed through severe pain. I tried all my possible means to get her back,after much begging,but all to no avail.and she confirmed it that she has made her decision,and she never wanted to see me again. So on one evening,as i was coming back from work,i met an old friend of mine who asked of my wife.So i explained every thing to her,so she told me that the only way i can get my wife back,is to visit a spell caster,because it has really worked for her too.So i never believed in spell,but i had no other choice,than to follow her advice. Then she gave me the email address of the spell caster whom she visited.{benedictsolutioncentre@yahoo.com}. So the next morning,i sent a mail to the address she gave to me,and the spell caster assured me that i will get my wife back the next day.What an amazing statement!! I never believed,so he spoke with me,and told me everything that i need to do. Then the next morning, So surprisingly, my wife who didn't call me for the past seven {7}months,gave me a call to inform me that she was coming back.So Amazing!! So that was how she came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and she apologized for her mistake,and for the pain she caused me and my children. Then from that day,our relationship was now stronger than how it were before,by the help of a spell caster DR benedict. So.
So,if you are in a similar problem or any kind of problems you can also contact him via his email(benedictsolutioncentre@yahoo.com}he is the solution to all your problems and predicaments in life.his email again is{benedictsolutioncentre@yahoo.com}.
HE ALSO SPECIALIZE IN THE THE FOLLOWING PROBLEMS;
(1) If you want your ex back.
(2) If you want to be promoted in your office.
(3) If you want a child.
(4) If you want to be rich.
(5) if you have any sickness like ( H I V/AIDS ),(CANCER) or any sickness
(6) if you are deaf and blind and you want to see and hear again.
once again make sure you contact him if you have any problem he will help you. his email address is(benedictsolutioncentre@yahoo.com}
I'm Pamela Scott from Las Vegas,USA.I can’t hide this amazing testimony that took place in my life. A powerful spell-caster named Dr. Candova brought back my love who left me and run off with another woman while I was six months pregnant,it was a painful period for me because i loved him so much an didn't want to lose him,so i contact Dr.Candova via email: CANDOVALOVESPELL@GMAIL.COM and whatsapp him with his number +2348131612153,he cast a spell for me and behold my husband was back to me and we are now a happy family,contact him to fix your relationship because he did it for me and i completely trust Dr.Candova to fix your relationship,Thank you Dr.Candova for this.
Enterprise version is allows maximum thirty users to work at once. And this version includes features from all versions of QuickBooks Desktop. This is the most advanced version of QuickBooks Desktop.
Setup quickbook
Quickbook has been experienced that any Android device (smartbook or tablet) and iOS device (iPad,iPod touch or iPhone) is compatible with the QuickBooks Online app. QuickBooks Online can be accessed from any web-enabled tablets or mobile device from a web browser.
Download quickbook app
Post a Comment